All relationships are unique. Even so there are times when couples find themselves stuck in repetitive patterns that leave them feeling misunderstood or alone. These can lead to feelings of being shut out, attacked, unwanted, not being heard, or craving greater closeness. Not risking their private feelings with each other results in a lack of mutual understanding often felt as a growing sense of emotional distance. Some common themes explored through relationship work include a lack of trust, feelings of jealousy that can lead to abusive behaviour, the impact of sexual or financial issues, work related stress, different goals, values or life changes, controlling behaviour or the impact of a betrayal or affair.
Whatever the current issues talking with someone with knowledge, training and experience can illuminate and guide you through them. Learning how to relate in a deeper emotional way often involves investigation into the feelings that lie beneath these patterns and the important messages they carry. This is where a therapist can help to develop an emotional awareness of the implicit needs underneath these defensive patterns.